Father’s Day
While we celebrated Father’s Day, sacrificial love kept ringing in my mind. I had no idea why, but I guess it is because of how Fathers generally love.
You will all agree with me that fathers are known to love by providing mainly financially while mothers are known to love by providing among others physical and spiritual support. You will often hear stories of many children and even grown-up adults about how much their mothers prayed for them and how much their fathers provided all the finances to get them where they are.
This got me wondering what the difference is between being a martyr in a relationship and expressing sacrificial love.
Historically, a martyr is someone who chooses to sacrifice their life or face pain and suffering instead of giving up something they hold sacred. While the term is still used this way today, it’s taken on a secondary meaning that’s a bit less dramatic.
Today, the term is sometimes used to describe someone who seems to always be suffering in one way or another; you can read up more on this at https://www.healthline.com/health/martyr-complex.
I would add that in the case of a mother and father, it would be the one that is least celebrated for reasons best known to the child without due regard to the sacrifices the parent made for this child. Usually, this is unfortunately the father for most children because as we all know life happens and somehow the children continue to see their mother more than their father.
Sacrificial love on the other hand in parenting is reflected in how parents offer up their lives to care for their children. According to Concise Theology, when a mother or father loves their child their kind of sacrificial love involves giving, spending, and impoverishing themselves up to the limit for their well-being.
In my own understanding this involves the parent stripping themselves of the need for honor when a child doesn’t acknowledge the efforts.
Having been one of those children that doesn’t recognize the sacrifices of their father out of ignorance, it is my hope and prayer that as we celebrate Father’s day, if you or someone you know has been like me and not acknowledged your Father’s efforts to get you where you are-may today be the beginning of a forever acknowledging and being grateful of the man whose blood flows within you.
If for anything, that biological element that met your mother’s biological element and became you.
Most importantly though, may you not let their labor in meeting and having you be in vain. Let’s go forth and express our love and gratitude to them for we are because they are.
Remember as Packer says: “Our love is to express our gratitude for God’s gracious love to us, and to be modeled on it”.
God loved us so graciously that he allowed our parents (married or not) and they had us. What happened thereafter, whether they stayed together or not; it doesn’t change the fact that because of their biological elements coming together we were brought forth.
We owe them that appreciation and love. To all the fathers hoping to receive acknowledgement from your children, today – may God hear your prayers and silent wishes.
To my biological Dad- I am because you are! It’s a humbling being your daughter. To my other young paternal father – thank you. To all my other father figures, today I celebrate you all.
To you who is reading, you know what to do. It is the right thing to do. Acknowledge. Appreciate and Celebrate.
Happy Father’s Day!
Hope & Faith,
Grateful Daughter
F.I.R.M